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I am sorry to hear that your spirits are low. My favorite silly french expression is Avoir le cafard. Maybe its my roots in Manhattan and thus aversion to cockroaches. But yes, having the cockroach is a low feeling! Everyone needs a Sarah in our lives. For deeper lows, I do find restarting my morning pages practice (Julia Cameron) to be very therapeutic. For mild ones, sleep and nature can be excellent healers. I almost never read agitating books, by which I mean high suspense, high tension, high weird, high anxiety. By contrast, I find certain types of books expecially delightful, namely, narrative non-fiction books about people or experiences that I am especially interested in. Currently I am reading The Slip by Prudence Peiffer about a group of artists between 1956-1967 on Coenties Slip in Manhattan. I'm fascinating with 20th century art history and, of course, NYC. So this is a wonderful escape from my anxiety over the upcoming election, or the global violence playing out, or the black cloud of AI or the climate crisis over my head. Some people find escape in Tolkien, others the fairy realm, some in snarky love stories. Me? I want Walt Whitman and non-fiction. What's your best escape read? Be sure you have one within arms reach.

We give our mother's an inordinate amount of power to hurt us. Try to remember she is a human, flawed like the rest of us. My advice: limit your exposure to her. This might mean not seeking her comfort, not sharing your life so openly with her, or simply calling half as frequently. Don't waste your time trying to understand her hostility. Often it has little to nothing to do with you. Just don't stick your fingers in the lion cage.

Your pictures are a delight and take me back to my own experiences in France. I am not a raw oyster person, despite having grown up in coastal New England. However, oyster stew (which certainly isn't a stew) was a long family tradition. My maternal uncle used to make it every Thanksgiving. So while living in Provence in Nov 2008, I hosted a Thanksgiving dinner for 13 French friends who knew little about the whole ritual except that it was a big American holiday where we ate Turkey. There are dozens of very funny stories I could share with you from that dinner adventure but the one I will share here is about the oyster stew.

My recipe required cups of shucked oysters but in France you must buy grams of oysters in their bulky shells. Thus I converted the cups I needed to grams, bought 4 oysters and weighed them shelled and shucked to determine the ratio, and then multiplied that ratio against my shucked oyster needs to arrived at my shelled oyster needs. This I took to the poisonerie at the market. However, in France, you buy oysters by "brand." I think to some degree this is true here now too. But in 2008 that wasn't the case in the US--and oyster was an oyster. The Poissonerier asked me did I want the ABC oyster that lived off of Biarritz where it was washed by a warmer water current or the XYZ oyster from 30 kms off Nantes where the water moved rapidly and cold. There were the PQR oysters raised at the base of the Calanques, all salty and full of calcium. Or imported oysters from Alaska or Louisiana. All of this in the twangy French of a Provencal fish monger. Overwhelmed I stammered my selection but alas! She had no where near enough oysters in any of the varieties I selected. So I bought what I could from her and headed to the poissonerie in Avignon and also the fish counter at my local Intermarche. With my icebox full of oysters, carefully wrapped in wax paper and string, I returned to our 16th century house and dug in its kitchen tool basket for an oyster knife. My maternal family owned a fish market and my mother could open oysters like a pro. She never bothered to teach me those skills but I knew the sounds and the action and to recognize the stout looking knife. Fortunately the couple who owned our house were also friends and Joel came over with with two oyster knives in hand on the eve of Thanksgiving. He taught high school French and spoke a few colloquial phrases in English just to show his teenage students he was hip. We shucked oysters into a collective bowl regardless of the rock on which they grew. About every third oyster Joel shucked he swallowed before it landed in the bowl as I mentally subtracted it from the grams needed. When I explained to him in my rough french that I intended to cook the naked oysters in butter, Joel sucked in his breath dubiously and shook his head disapprovingly. "non, non," he said. I explained it was a traditional New England dish and promised he would love it which he responded by swallowing another raw oyster as an act of defiance. Essentially oyster stew is a saute of minced shallots and butter, then oysters, then loads of cream and more butter. When you sip the soup its hot cream, thinner than a chowder, with a buttery glisten to its surface, and occasionally you have a soft nugget of oyster, slightly briny and salty. Its all the things the french most love. As I carefully followed my uncle's recipe, I felt fairly certain this recipe would please my French guests. But by the time they each took their ladder back chair around the long farm table in our dining room gossip had spread that the aroma indicated I had COOKED the oysters. They compared recipes they had had and hated where oysters had been cooked. They remembered rare varieties of oysters they had swallowed raw decades earlier. They asked loaded questions as to WHY I would want to cook or mix my beautiful oysters. The only way to answer was to fill their bowls. They looked down through the steam into the shiny white soup and raised their round spoons. It was like a child trying spinach for the first time. They slurped, tasted, tried again. I saw a thumbs up. Then, heard an "ooh la la." Then silence except for the contented slurps, clink of spoons against porcelain, and the occasional napkin making a swipe.

Good luck with your leg and the running.

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Wow that is a great story and quite an accomplishment. You should share that recipe because if it got the French thumbs up it must be delish! Thank you for taking the time to tell us this awesome story and for all your tips and advice which are very much appreciated. Also re the story: I love that he "swallowed another oyster in defiance" and that so much of the action happened through smells and slurps and head shakes. Bravo!

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Oh dear girl, I'm sorry you are having a down time. And I felt the pain of the 'brutal comment'...it's a familiar pattern in our extended family and having grown up surrounded by that, I know how bruising that can be. I'd say honor your exhaustion with rest. Don't feel guilty about feeling however you feel and immerse yourself in gentleness to yourself. It will pass and you will have abundant wonderful things to give to those around you...but you do need to care for yourself in order to be able to do that. If you're sad, be sad til you don't need to be sad anymore. Love, Aunt Missy

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Thank you dear Aunt Missy. You have no idea how validating that feels, even if I'm sorry you've been surrounded by it too. Also I agree with this advice and I'll try to apply it. Sending love from la belle France

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Thank you for sharing your personal challenges. No matter where we are in the world or how our life looks like from the outside, we all face emotional difficulties at times. I can relate living in Hawaii...looking from the outside, I am living in Paradise, however I also experience the same emotional challenges we all feel from time to time. I have a saying though; "You can have a bad day anywhere, but a bad day in Hawaii (or France!) is a good day." ;) You are going through a lot right now, so it makes sense that you are feeling like a heavy bumblebee. Do not feel guilty for these feelings. All your feelings are valid. Feelings are energies that pass through us, they are not us. When we resist those feelings we don't want to feel, or think we "shouldn't" be feeling is when they can get stuck in our bodies and mind and cause dis-ease. Maybe your leg pain is an expression of a feeling you have been resisting? It is like a crying baby in the room, if we ignore it, it only gets worse. Love all your feelings, as you would a crying baby or a hurt child. They are all part of life. When we can sit with them and name them and feel the area in the body they are manifesting, then we are not in resistance. We acknowledge them, love them and release them. There is a technique called the Release Technique or Sedona Technique (Youtube has some great meditations on this) that is simple yet powerful. It is acknowledging, loving and releasing. First sit and breathe, noticing what you are feeling. Name it, notice the area of your body it is manifesting. Say 'hello (said emotion), I feel you and I love you; you are just an energy passing through'. BREATHE. Then imagine a big window (or French door) in that area of your body. Open it and let set those feelings free to fly out the window (like a happy bumblebee ;) Keep releasing and breathing. The key to releasing is BREATHING. Deep long breaths. Your breath is like the Drain-O that unclogs energy channels so we can freely flow with life again. Hope this helps xo. And yes, doing things that bring you joy like you did with your wonderful friend are great ways to nurture yourself and feel the joy in life! Bon Continue!

By the way, I love the cute funny phrases you provided here! Especially "I am farting fire" LOL!! I am definitely adding those to my repertoire! You have lovely energy and writing skills!

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There are so many great things in this comment--merci ! I'm going to use the one about having a bad day in France--it's so true. Also what you say about emotions/feelings passing through is such a good reminder. Plus the Drain-O analogy--tops! I'm so happy you got a few new French phrases to put in the mix, and I'm wishing you a fabulously fire-farting weekend :-) Bisous xo

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I hope the bumbles fly away soon. No bees for me; just sheer overwhelm, excitement, fear, and joy as we prepare for our move to France at the end of October! Selling just about everything we own and leaving mementos and cherished items with friends feels kind of surreal at the moment. Nice to have you sharing your experiences as well as other newbies to make me feel a little more comfy as we navigate our way thru this Crazy Adventure!

Santè

Sara

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Oh, reading this brought me right back to the excitement of my move to France! I am wishing you que du bonheur (nothing but happiness) in your new adventure. Even on down days, it is such a wonderful place to live. Bienvenue !

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I think it’s September that gives us the demi-blues! We’ve had a house here for 20 years, and regularly visited for 15 yrs before, but I have never been here in September! After a fabulous Breton summer, everything is quiet, children (and their parents) have returned to their routines and there is no more Grand Vacances until at least December. Taking a deep breath (and ferry to England!). Thank you for your super post.

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I agree, there's just something about September...let us embrace the cafard and the bumblebee blues! You are so lucky to have a home in la Bretagne. I was mesmerized by the whole region this summer and can't wait to return. Bisous :-)

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I have been feeling the blues too, being new to French system since last year even though, I have been coming to France for almost 20 years but living here is another level, which I don't think most of my friends would understand, unless you are going through it. It good to hear I am not alone.

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You are not alone! And yes I agree, it is a singular and sometimes lonely experience, even when you have friends and family in France. Changing languages, cultures, foods and systems is not for the faint of heart and it's a far cry from tourism, as you know. I hope your blues clear soon. We'll be here for you! Bonne continuation xoxo

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I love your blog--thank you! I've had the bumblebees the past couple of weeks as well, feeling overwhelmed with my new life in France and all of the administrative tasks involved during these first few months, on top of embracing my first rentrée, discovering all of the French associations, and feeling an urgency to join them all in an effort to make new friends and/or for fear of missing out. I also find that cooking helps, although I might be sipping a bit too much wine during (and after) the process... I'm very much looking forward to trying your sausage pasta recipe, especially since I just bought new-to-me Savoie sausage from my local bio co-op. Hope the bumblebees subside for you soon--you'll be farting fire in no time! ;)

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This comment is straight bumblebee repellent! J'adore !

And by the way, Bienvenue en France ! For the French administration just keep chipping away, it will all get done. I know exactly what you mean about the associations. My advice: just start with one if you even have the bandwidth. They will all be there whenever you're ready.

Aren't these French expressions so adorable? They just make me giggle

Thank you for being here and for sharing your thoughts. It is so good to know we're not alone. I'm wishing you all the very best here in l'Hexagone. Bonne continuation !

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The blues catch up to everybody! Of course you have a right to feel how you do, so long as you try not to get lost in them. Hope the croissants and oysters and friends and cooking helps!

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Thank you so much for this. Greetings from the French countryside :-)

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I usually feel a bit of the blues around Christmas, but it’s just a phase. I remind myself to focus on the bright side of life, knowing everything will be OK in the end. And of course, a good glass of wine with great company always helps lift my spirits. Things will get better!

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Thank you for this. It helped me today, when I needed it :-) And I agree with all you said.

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Those autumn blues, they can be as regular as the seasons, and for a reason. I note now the yellow leaves on the trees lining the Boulevards Dubouchage and Victor Hugo here; the forecasts of rain in the high country and the sometimes brown water filtering into the Baie des Anges from the Paillon after a downpour. Shorter days, they abbreviate so quickly there is no denying they will being the darkness of late December. But ... there's a lovely comfort in the retreat of the tourists, the return of wintry foods -- champignons, courges et figues ! And honestly, I like to be able to pull on my soft wool jumpers and wrap the neck with favourite scarves once again ! So lots to be cheerful about, even if we regret summer's departure.

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What a lovely and poetic comment. I actually read it out loud to Monsieur B. Merci merci !

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I loved reading this, thank you. Love the linguistic asides, the stories and fab photos. 👏🏼

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Merci bien, especially for taking the time to write ! You have made my whole week :-)

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I can very much relate to this. In fact, my latest french writing practice was on a very similar theme. (I may or may not actually publish it as a post.) Incidentally, when I thought I saw Alex Honnold in Grenoble this summer I assumed that my mind was playing tricks on me. It almost certainly was, but it was amusing nonetheless to stumble upon the mention of him in this post.

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Thank you for taking the time to write a comment! I'll take a look and hope to find your piece as well :-)

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I love The Artist's Way! I dove into that book many years ago and have some hilarious and suprising "Morning Page" to look back upon! Enjoy!

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I'm loving it too! And yes, those morning pages haha!

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Thank you for sharing your personal challenges. No matter where we are in the world or what our life looks like on the outside, we face different challenges and emotions. Do not feel guilty for feeling like a bumblebee ;) - all your feelings are valid. You are dealing with a lot right now, so allow yourself to move through all of those emotions. Emotions are energies that pass through us when we acknowledge and love every one of them...and yes, even the ones we don't want to feel or think we "shouldn't" be feeling. When we ignore or resist feelings, that's when they get stuck and can cause dis-ease. Maybe your leg pain has something to do with a stuck emotion you have been resisting? There is a great technique called the release technique or Sedona technique (Youtube has some great mediations on this) that is so simple yet powerful. You simply acknowledge and name what you are feeling and recognize the area in your body that you are feeling it, as if saying hello to it. Then love it, like you would a crying baby or hurt or fearful child. Just give that feeling and body part love. Then imagine a big window (or French door) on that area and allow that feeling to be free and release it...all the while BREATHING. The breath is key here in releasing and loving. Deep long breaths. Smile as you breathe. Smiling helps elevate the mood even when you don't feel like smiling. For my own self, living in Hawaii, I can relate to how you are feeling. From the outside I am living in Paradise, yet I face the same emotional challenges we all face from time to time. I am grateful to have all this beautiful nature and space around me and the spiritual and therapeutic tools I have learned throughout my life, (and continue learning). I have a saying; "You can have a bad day anywhere, but a bad day in Hawaii (or France) is a good day." ;) I hope this helps xo. By the way, I love the fun phrases you provided in this article. I'll be adding those to my repertoire! I especially love "I'm farting fire" LOL!

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Very much relate! Music, nature, pups and good friends help. 💕

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Amen. I have to remember to activate little joys like this because you're so right. Wishing you a sweet weekend :-)

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I'm so glad that you're feeling a bit better! Little changes do seem to help, don't they? For me, though this is super cliché, a good 1hr yoga session helps immensely. Whether from someone I follow on YT, or a class, getting my body stretched out helps to lift me up. Bumble bees are cute and amazing, but not in this sense! Thank you for your stories, I love reading them!

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Thank you. This is a very good idea--not cliché at all. I have been struggling because I haven't found a yoga studio I really like in Paris, but you just reminded me (duh!) that I can always do an online class. I really appreciate your taking the time to write. Sending you un grand merci from the French countryside xo

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